Tag Archives: slasher

Brief Notes on Movies Vol. 1 No. 4

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Sometimes Kalene and I spend so long trying to decide on which movie to watch that we run out of time for actual viewing. To combat this, I sought out several online lists of best/worst movies in different genres.

These films appear on a Rotten Tomatoes list of the best slasher films.

#91: Hell Fest (2018)

  • Director: Gregory Plotkin
  • Starring: Amy Forsyth, Bex Taylor-Klaus, Stephen Conroy
  • Had I seen it before? No  
  • Should it be on such a list? This movie doesn’t score very highly on IMDB or RottenTomatoes. I get it. There really isn’t much story—a group of friends attend a hell-themed set of haunted houses and are targeted by a masked killer who seems to pick them out randomly—and so the plot has to depend on the tried-and-true method of manufacturing reasons for the characters to wander off alone one at a time. That might be okay if those scenes also led the characters further toward their external goals and some kind of personal development, but the movie really is all about the stalking and the kills. Okay then. That being said, what the movie tries to do is limited, but it’s effective within those limitations. Plus the cast is filled with stronger actors than you often see in slashers. If you’re into this genre and haven’t given the movie a chance, check it out. Maybe you’ll agree with me that it belongs on this list.

#90: Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers (1988)

  • Director: Dwight H. Little
  • Starring: Donald Pleasance, Ellie Cornell, Danielle Harris
  • Had I seen it before? Many times.  
  • Should it be on such a list? [Again, sorry for the negativity] Michael’s family issues continue. This time he’s been in a coma for years because his sister/nemesis Laurie Strode has died, but as soon as he hears he has a niece, it’s game on. Why the parents of Haddonfield haven’t stopped letting their kids go trick-or-treating—or, y’know, why they haven’t just moved—is beyond me, but sure enough, when little Jamie tries to have some fun, her murderous uncle shows up for another night of carnage. Even more than in his two previous appearances, Michael basically becomes a living nightmare who always manages to keep up with his prey even though he never runs and seldom drives. Barring a tactical nuclear strike, he seems immortal. That dials down the drama, since we know at this point that we’re just marking time until the final showdown, which will likely lead to more sequels wherein we’ll rinse and repeat. Still, for the fourth film in a slasher franchise, the movie’s not bad. I say let it stay on the list.

#89: Halloween Ends (2022)

  • Director: David Gordon Green
  • Starring: Jamie Lee Curtis, Andi Matichak, James Jude Courtney
  • Had I seen it before? Just once, in theaters.
  • Should it be on such a list? [Again, sorry for the negativity] Absolutely not. Look, I desperately wanted to like this movie, but the filmmakers committed one of the worst instances of misreading the audience I’ve ever seen. After forty years of watching Laurie Strode and Michael Myers slug it out, and with the film promising to be the capstone on the whole Myers-Strode war, I’m pretty sure most fans wanted to see a truly epic clash between the two main characters. Instead, most of the movie focuses on Corey, a new character who apparently wants to be Michael. As for the Shape himself, he’s barely in the movie until the last 20 minutes or so, when he and Laurie finally face off. That might have been okay for a sequel to this movie; fans might never accept a slasher version of Halloween without Michael, but we could have found out with a stand-alone movie after Michael’s apparently permanent death. Instead, this movie feels like a bait-and-switch. If you ripped out the last act of Halloween Ends and tacked it onto the end of Green’s first Halloween, you might have the best movie in the series. As is, though, this one disappoints on just about every level.

#88: Maniac (1980)

  • Director: William Lustig
  • Starring: Joe Spinell, Caroline Munro, Abigail Clayton
  • Had I seen it before? A couple of times back in the 80s.
  • Should it be on such a list? Probably. Though the movie looks like it was shot for about 37 cents, it does a strong job representing the grime and slime of New York City in the late 70s-early 80s. The often-darkly shot film is full of littered streets and sleazy places with cheap neon signs and cars a couple months away from the junkyard. The titular maniac, Frank Zito, suffers from some of the worst mommy issues this side of Norman Bates, and as he stalks the women he both desires and hates, his heavy breathing and constant grunting combine with the voyeuristic camerawork to make the viewer feel as dirty as the killer. His penchant for scalping his victims and decorating mannequins with their hair makes the viewer’s skin crawl, and some of the kills are truly disgusting. The practical effects of Tom Savini, who does double duty as a victim, assault the audience with blood and tattered flesh. The acting isn’t great, and if you’re like me, you may wonder what the attractive woman sees in Frank Zito, but as a cheap, effective movie, Maniac works. You might not ever want to watch it again, but every slasher fan should see it once.

#87: Tourist Trap (1979)

  • Director: David Schmoeller
  • Starring: Chuck Connors, Jocelyn Jones, Jon Van Ness
  • Had I seen it before? Not that I remember.
  • Should it be on such a list? I’m not sure this movie qualifies as a slasher. A couple of kills involve the bad guy penetrating the victims’ bodies with found objects, but most of the knuckle-headed characters are dispatched in other ways, including through the use of the killer’s apparent telekinetic powers. I’m not sure Michael Myers and Jason Vorhees would let this guy in the club. The film uses the genre’s typical And Then There Were None plot, with the characters making the worst possible decisions and wandering off into dark places one at a time, despite how they all keep vanishing. Tourist Trap has the remote location in which the characters are trapped, the rural buildings in various stages of dilapidation, the mysterious masked killer whose true identity surprises no one, the Final Girl, and so forth. It even swipes Psycho’s the-new-highway-has-ruined-my-business setup. By and large, the acting fits the standard criteria for cheap horror movies of the time, though the slumming Chuck Connors plays down to the level of his co-stars. For me, this one’s on the fence. I’m okay with the author of this list using it, but it’s not as good as some of the ones below it and could be knocked out of the running entirely as time passes.  

There will be more installments in the future. Join me, won’t you?

In the meantime, buy my books. All the cool kids are doing it.

Got comments, questions, or complaints? Email me.

Brief Notes on Movies Vol. 1 No. 3

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Sometimes Kalene and I spend so long trying to decide on which movie to watch that we run out of time for actual viewing. To combat this, I sought out several online lists of best/worst movies in different genres.

This comes from from a Rotten Tomatoes list of the best slasher films.

#93: Deadly Blessing (1981)

  • Director: Wes Craven
  • Starring: Maren Jensen, Ernest Borgnine, Susan Buckner, Sharon Stone
  • Had I seen it before? Not that I remember.  
  • Should it be on such a list? [I hate saying negative things about other people’s work, but when you’re doing a project like this, sometimes you’re forced to. Sorry!] For the first two-thirds of the movie, you would be tempted to say yes. A young Sharon Stone, Academy Award winner Ernest Borgnine (!!!), an isolated location, religious conflict—what’s not to love? Unfortunately, this is a movie you could show to film school students if you want to illustrate the meaning of “third-act problems.” The whole movie goes off the rails, as if the creative team realized they had no idea how to end it. Red herrings come so furiously that it’s hard to keep up, and none of them make much sense. Plus, like The Incubus, this movie seems to forget that incubi are male. If I recall correctly, this was one of Wes Craven’s work-for-hire projects he made while working on the movies and shows he actually cared about. It shows. Given the mess at the end, it’s tough to believe there aren’t slasher movies that could replace this one on the list.

#92: Halloween Kills (2021)

  • Director: David Gordon Green
  • Starring: Jamie Lee Curtis, Judy Greer, Andi Matichak
  • Had I seen it before: Yes, in the theater.
  • Should it be on such a list? [Again, sorry for the negativity] Absolutely not. I hated this movie when I first saw it. Watching it again proved a better experience, but not by much. The first of Green’s Halloween trilogy is one of the best horror movies I’ve seen. It gives John Carpenter’s original film a run for its money as best in the franchise. This one disappointed me about as much as any sequel ever has. Much like Halloween II, there isn’t much of a story. Michael meanders about Haddonfield, killing everyone he sees as he slowly makes his way back to his old house. Everyone in town tries to stop him. That’s pretty much it, which might have been enough to make a decent middle film in a slasher trilogy if it weren’t for the other problems. The nature of the movie sticks Laurie Strode in a hospital room for most of the movie, and unlike in Halloween II, she doesn’t even face off against Michael. Instead, we see a mob of incompetent nitwits take on the Shape with all the unearned confidence of a middle school wide receiver telling everyone that pro cornerbacks could never cover him. Chief among the boobs is Anthony Michael Hall’s Tommy, the grown-up version of an OG survivor. He leads the mob in all the wrong directions. They use deeply stupid strategies to corral Michael. They go after the wrong people, at one point mistaking a short and rotund mental patient for the tall, intimidating killer. And don’t even get me started on the repeated chants of “Evil dies tonight!” or the long speeches by Tommy and Laurie as they hit the viewers over the head with what it’s all supposed to mean. Plus, the ending squanders some of the feminist good will the first movie earned. This is simply not a good movie, though if all you’re looking for is to see Michael looking like a badass as he slaughters enough people to make a football team, check it out.

There will be more installments in the future. Join me, won’t you?

In the meantime, buy my books. All the cool kids are doing it.

Got comments, questions, or complaints? Email me.

Brief Notes on Movies Vol. 1 No. 2

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Sometimes Kalene and I spend so long trying to decide on which movie to watch that we run out of time for actual viewing. To combat this, I sought out several online lists of best/worst movies in different genres.

This comes from from a Rotten Tomatoes list of the best slasher films.

#94: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003)

  • Director: Marcus Nispel
  • Starring: Jessica Biel, Jonathan Tucker, Andrew Bryniarski
  • Had I seen it before? No, because like a lot of critics, I looked on this movie as unnecessary. Why remake a good movie without updating anything? It just seemed repetitive.
  • Should it be on such a list? You know what? I’m okay with it. Yes, it remakes the original without doing something new to justify its existence, but the acting is a lot better than you often see in slasher films. The new death house is creepy, more in an typical-house-of-horrors way than in the original “inbred cannibal hicks with terrible taste in decorating” set design. Like the original, it feels brutal without actually showing all that much gore. The filmmakers miss the subtler (!!) aspects of Leatherface’s masks, but this doesn’t hurt much. Jessica Biel also isn’t required to scream nonstop for half an hour, which cuts down on the teeth-grating tension of the original, but I’m not complaining. One TCM using that many screams is fine. So were the critics right? Is this movie unnecessary? Yep, but it exists anyway, and unless you’re simply offended that anyone would remake the original, this one isn’t a bad watch.

There will be more installments in the future. Join me, won’t you?

In the meantime, buy my books. All the cool kids are doing it.

Got comments, questions, or complaints? Email me.

Brief Notes on Movies Vol. 1 No. 1

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Sometimes Kalene and I spend so long trying to decide on which movie to watch that we run out of time for actual viewing. To combat this, I sought out several online lists of best/worst movies in different genres.

Here are some results from a Rotten Tomatoes list of the best slasher films.

#100: The Incubus (1981)

  • Director: John Hough
  • Starring: John Cassavetes, John Ireland, Kerrie Keane
  • Had I seen it before? Not that I recall.
  • Should it be on such a list? I’ll just say it wasn’t for me. It was nice to see John Cassavetes, but the acting, editing, and writing seem to match the movie’s RT “rotten” score. It would have been nice to see more of the subplots be resolved. Some of the minor characters don’t seem to justify their existence. Surely there are 100 better slasher movies.

#99: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2022)

  • Director: David Blue Garcia
  • Starring: Sarah Yarkin, Elsie Fisher, Mark Burnham
  • Had I seen it before? No.
  • Should it be on such a list? I’m torn. The premise is a bit hard to believe; Leatherface has just been hanging around a deserted town all this time? In all that silence, nobody hears the screams of victims and the roaring chainsaw? On the other hand, the acting is often good, and the kills and scares often work well. I guess I can see why someone would put this on the list, but don’t come to the movie hoping to experience the same kind of visceral horror the first, less slick TCM gave us.

#98: A Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream Child (1989)

  • Director: Stephen Hopkins
  • Starring: Robert Englund, Lisa Wilcox, Kelly Jo Minter
  • Had I seen it before: Yes, several times. We rewatched it a few months ago, so we didn’t revisit it in sequence with the list.
  • Should it be on such a list? Let’s put it this way: If this one makes the top 100, then Elm Street #1-4 and New Nightmare better be on here, because all of them are better. Maddeningly, this one immediately erases most of the characters from #4, and apparently they couldn’t convince Patricia Arquette to return, which contributes to the less-than-stellar acting. By this time, Freddy is more comedian than monster, and we know better than to trust any ending that seems to leave him dead (again). I hate to say negative things about anyone else’s art, and Elm Street completists will want to take a look, but otherwise this is one of the weaker entries in the franchise.

#97: Madman (1981)

  • Direction: Joe Giannone
  • Starring: Gaylen Ross, Tony Nunziata, Harriett Bass
  • Had I seen it before? No, unless my 1980s exploits erased it from my memory.
  • Should it be on such a list? Look, I doubt anyone will argue that this film aspires to high art. Much of its execution will probably remind you of Friday the 13th and its various sequels: Boneheaded camp counselors wander into a supernatural killer’s woodsy territory, make the worst possible decisions, and get picked off one by one. That said, the film does give the titular madman a different backstory, including an evocation that echoes Bloody Mary and Candyman. The kills are mostly typical stuff, and you’ll probably wonder why there are seven or eight counselors for only five kids or so, but take my word for it; you’ve seen much worse acting. I do wish someone had told Giannone not to shoot so many takes that stretch out and out. Do we really need to pause for a full minute while a character looks around at nothing? Or follow someone across a large room as they shuffle inch by inch toward the next kill? No, we do not. Still, it’s fun in that cheap, amateurish way that provides much of the genre’s charm. I’m okay with its placement.

#96: Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood (1988)

  • Director: John Carl Buechler
  • Starring: Terry Kiser, Jennifer Banko, John Ortin
  • Had I seen it before? Several times. We watched it again a couple of months ago, so we didn’t revisit it for this list.
  • Should it be on such a list? I’m never sure why characters keep going back to Camp Crystal Lake. “Sure, the last six sets of counselors were brutally murdered, but I’m sure we’ll be fine.” This movie reflects the continuing shift away from counselors and toward residents of the lake area and/or those who show up specifically to find Jason Vorhees. That helps with the realism of a movie that otherwise nudges the human characters toward the supernatural, where Jason has already been living. Having said that, the storyline with Tina’s father makes little sense. I’m never sure why Tina’s mom trust Dr. Crews so much when he’s clearly shady. Not that any of this is supposed to matter. Jason is the real protagonist at this point. We’re mostly here for the kills. In any case, surely slasher writers and directors have produced enough quality work that the seventh installment of this franchise wouldn’t make the list. The movie isn’t offensively bad like the very worst films in history. It’s an acceptable movie if you realize ahead of time that you’ll need to grade on a sliding scale. Still, I was surprised it made this list.

 #95: Halloween II (1981)

  • Director: Rick Rosenthal
  • Starring: Jamie Lee Curtis, Donald Pleasence, Charles Cyphers
  • Had I seen it before? Lots of times. We watched it again a couple of months ago, so we didn’t revisit it for this list.
  • Should it be on such a list? Yes. The film was written by franchise creator and original director John Carpenter and Debra Hill. It’s the last Halloween film to star Jamie Lee Curtis until her return several years later. The whole movie consists of Michael Myers stalking an injured Laurie Strode through a hospital and dispatching various medical personnel along the way. Of course, Donald Pleasence’s Dr. Loomis tries to stop him, leading to an explosive finale some of the subsequent movies basically ignore. The vicious-cat-and-mouse game doesn’t make for much of a story, but the cast elevates the material enough that I’m surprised the movie is this low on the list. Clearly a second-tier franchise entry that doesn’t have much in the way of character development, it’s still got enough going for it to justify your time.

There will be more installments in the future. Join me, won’t you?

In the meantime, buy my books. All the cool kids are doing it.

Got comments, questions, or complaints? Email me.

New Essay on Role Reboot: #HalloweenMovie, #TimesUp

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Check out my latest on RoleReboot.org.

http://rolereboot.org/culture-and-politics/details/2018-10-halloween-2018-a-horror-film-for-the-timesup-era/